A Nobel prize winner once said this:
You don’t choose your family. They’re God’s gift to you, as you are to them. You don’t choose your family. But we can choose to make our family God-like.

This is actually in the will of God. The Bible tells us a prudent wife is from God and children are a heritage from God. These are all blessings God grants us when we choose to include Him in our marriage and family.

You don’t choose your family. But our family is still a gift from God. It is a gift in two aspects:

1. A gift of providence; a gift of love
   For example, when we’re young, we’re provided for. Our family provides us with physical and emotional needs. We can receive comfort when we’re in despair. And we rejoice together in a family at critical milestones - birthdays, anniversaries, fathers’ and mothers’ days.
2. Our family is a gift as they help us grow. Some of us may not have complete Pr wholesome families. But conditions of adversity builds our character. Our family becomes a gift to make us much better person.

More than just a gift, a family ought to be a conduit of God’s blessing.

Take Abraham for example. God told him to leave his home and go to the promised land. Abraham obeyed and was blessed. This blessing wasn’t only to him, it came to his entire family. If we look at how the story unfolds, this blessing was extended to all nations. Because God says to Abraham, through you all the nations will be blessed. That happened when Abraham made the decision to obey God and God’s calling to leave home. The decision he made was good and resulted in a good impact on his family. Good decisions lead to good outcomes, as do bad ones.

What are these decisions we have to be mindful of, and pay attention to as we make them in our families?

1. Do our decisions have a strong emphasis on God or a strong emphasis on the world?
   Gen 12:5
   Abraham took his family and all his possessions in Haran (even his nephew Lot) to Canaan. The emphasis of Abraham’s decision was made solely on God. It was very God centric. His decision would appear irrational. He was happily staying in this place, but he went left to go to some promised land he’s never seen; a place whose whereabouts he doesn’t even know about. This seems an irrational decision, but it was God-centric.

They arrived at the land of Canaan and found out they weren’t the only ones in the so-called promised land (v6 Canaanites were there in the land). If we put ourselves in Abraham’s shoes: God has promised to give me this land. I’ve brought my whole family to this place. I trust you God but there’s already people here!

v7
Abraham built an altar to the Lord. He shows continuous trust. “I continue to trust you. So I’m going to build an altar to worship You on this place!” His positive reaction to God had a positive ripple on his family.

When Abraham and his wife died, they still hadn’t inherited the land yet. Despite all these things, Abraham and his family continued on this land. He continued a life of building altars. His decisions were all based on God, and we know things turned out well.

We know that what Abraham ultimately received far exceeds what he had initially. The immense grace and blessings he received from God far exceeds what he lost from moving out from Haran.

We know he eventually became the father of faith, the father of God’s nation; the conduit from which the blessings of God flowed to all nations.

All the decisions he made was God-centred. All the decisions he made had a positive impact on his family.

We also take a look at Lot. Lot followed Abraham to the land of Canaan. That was a good decision! But it was short lived.

Gen 13:5-13
Abraham and his family became very prosperous after they came back from Egypt; rich in livestock, silver and gold. Lot also had flocks, herds and tents. The land could no longer support them. Their possessions were so great, it was difficult to stay together. An argument broke up between the herdsmen. Abraham acknowledged there shouldn’t be strife and they needed to separated. “If you go left I’ll go right. If you go right I’ll go left.”

Lot was so attracted by Jordan. It was well watered like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt. He hence chose this. He left Abraham m and journeyed east. Abraham continued to dwell in the land of Canaan. Lot dwelt in the cities of the plain and pitched his tent even as far as Sodom. Although the two families were together when they came out of Haran, they now separate. The problem with this place is Sodom. The people were exceedingly wicked and sinful against the Lord. The separation Lot made from Abraham actually had a profound impact on his family. From this point onwards, there’s no records of Lot and his family building an altar. But Abraham continued his life of building altars.

Lot started to pitch his tent even as far as Sodom. He actually eventually stayed in Sodom.

Gen 19:1-2
Two angels arrived in the city of Sodom. Lot met these two angles, bowed his head and invited them to stay at his house. While Sodom was at it’s near destruction, Lot was staying in a HOUSE in Sodom.

Gen 19:4-11
The problem with Sodom is that it’s a place that’s exceedingly wicked. From here we can understand what exceedingly wicked means. The men in the city, both young and old, all people from every quarter came to surround the house of Lot. Were they there to welcome the two angels? No, they wanted to know them carnally eeks. This means to have a sexual relationship with them. What the Bible says homosexuality is wicked.

The way Lot responded was also not very appropriate. Yes he wanted to protect the two angels in his house. But he wants to do so by giving his two daughters to them! From a moral POV, Lot’s morals also were not very correct in the eyes of God.

Regarding homosexuality:
Last Saturday (today is 5/7/18), Singapore celebrated the Pink Dot Movement. The reports say thousands showed up. Lee Hsien Yang was also there for the first time with his son and son-in-law. As a nation, not only have we degenerated in our morals, we are also shoring up a lot of the wrath of God. This was the reason God wanted to destroy Sodom. The LGBTQ community’s movement is going to get stronger and stronger. They want to fight for equality. They want to remove criminalising sex between the same gender.

As Christians we should always fight against this movement. But this is also a battle we will never win. The movement in this world is only going to get stronger and stronger. When we look at these things around us from the perspective here in Gen 19, these things happening today aren’t new. They happened in Sodom. The morals deteriorate so badly until men BOTH young and old wanted to know the angels carnally. This kind of thing that people usually do in dark rooms was openly showcased. This was what led to its destruction.

Lot and his family lived in such an environment. They made the decision to pitch their tents near and finally live in Sodom. No wonder there’re no other records of Lot and his family building an altar. Sodom may indeed be brimming in life (as attracted as Egypt), but among these things are also sinful pleasures.

We’ve read how the morality in Lord is not quite right already. If we continue to read on, Lot’s family’s concept of God wasn’t strong. While staying in Sodom, Lot wasn’t able to inculcate God in their lives.

Gen 19:14
When Lot warned his sons-in-law that God would destroy Sodom, they thought he was joking. “Who is God? Never heard before. Destroy this city? You must be joking!”

Gen 19:15-16
The angels urged Lot and his family to leave. But they LINGERED. The angels had to hold their hands and pull them out of the city. Staying in the city of Sodom only had negative impacts on the family. While fleeing, his wife turned back to look at the city, and became a pillar of salt.

When Lot chose the plain of Jordan, of Sodom, he saw the benefits it could bring to his family. It’s a great pity he exchanged that with having God in his family. God was never part of their family. Their faith went down that nobody in the family knew God. The decision that he made had a great impact on his family.

On the contrary, as long as he lived, Abraham and his family didn’t enjoy all these pleasures. Lot had a house. Abraham contoured to live in this. But Abraham was able to preserve faith in the family. He’s able to continue a life of worship that he passed down to the next generation.

But Lot’s family became totally insensitive to God. Their faith was a failure.

Coming back to us today, if we examine the decisions we make in our family:
Every family is different. Every family has their own problems. Every fakikybis also at a different stage. Some of us have our older parents with us. Some of us just started out because we just got married. Some of us have little children. Some of us have children in teenage years. Regardless of the forms and stages our families are at, reflecting on Abraham’s and Lot’s families, is God a priority in our family decisions? Or do we prioritise worldly matters in our decisions? A better job is more important than building up our family’s faith. Amidst tuition fever to help the children excel in the world, are we doing this at the expense of their faith. They may become successful in the careers, or become important people in the world. But how about them being used for God’s glory? If our emphasis continues to be everything in the world for all the decisions we make in our family, do we not fear our family will end up like Lot’s?

If not, what can we do? 2 things we can learn from Abraham and his family:
1) Our life should be centred around building altars. The primary purpose should be on worshipping God
2) To make God centred decisions, bring God into the decision making process. Many things may appear very logical for worldly gains. But they may not be right in the eyes of God.

We believe we CAN make all these decisions well. Abraham showed us we did. We’re all sons of God. Like father, like son. We too can emulate our father; imitate the life of Abraham.

1. One more point but time constraint so will move to conclusion

The speaker would like to share about his family:
As a family, many decisions are made all the time. Even things like what to eat. You’d be surprised how diverse the response is when asked, “What’s for dinner?”

Two years ago, they decided to have an activity at home that was more focused on God. His children are still young and pretty restless. They don’t study a lot. They spend a lot of time watching TV and making things at home (making the house messy). More importantly, all of them didn’t have the Holy Spirit. So he thought they should start a family service. That thought was in sync with his wife’s thoughts. “Let’s start this family service!” It has a very simple format.
• Silent Prayer (each child will have duty on different days. Pick 2 hymns)
• Read 1-2 chapters in the Bible
• Share thoughts if any
• Pray together for 15min (start off with 10min)
(Done on days there are no church activities)

Thank God that through the family services, his second child was the first to receive the Holy Spirit during it. Then his third child, also during the family service. Quite close to each other. The oldest, seeing her two younger brothers had received the Holy Spirit, prayed very hard and received in the Bible seminar last year (2018).

Aside from receiving the Holy Spirit, the family service brought his family members closer together. It’s important for us to get together to praise god and read the word. Sometimes through sharing, he can know the fears each other have. It also reveals the way his children thinks. It’s a good opportunity to pray as a family, especially for the needs of another.

But don’t think it’s all rosy and nice. It’s not easy at all. Until today, the children are still rowdy.

When he says, “Let’s start the service!” Someone’s still struggling to eat the fruit. Someone will say, “I need to go toilet first!” “Can wait for advertisement??”

It’s not perfect. But the important point the speaker feels is to continue to do this; make it an SOP in the family.

The speaker shares this not to show off. The way he does it is not perfect either. He just hopes we can emphasise more on God. There are things shared by his daughter that comforts him. She made a stand in front of her classmates that she doesn’t accept LGBT. Even her good friend asked, “Huh?? Are you afraid of gay??” It brought great joy to the speaker as a father.

We should and can carry this out. God will definitely help us.

Psa 127:1-2
Unless the Lord builds the house, They labor in vain who build it; Unless the Lord guards the city, The watchman stays awake in vain.

We do many things to build up our families. We try to make the best decisions for them. We make all these decisions in their best interest. We do our best to provide whatever we can for them, and to shield them from the bad. But this psalm reminds us that unless the Lord Himself builds the house, they labour in vain who builds it.

We’re building our families, we’re guiding our house. But here reminds us that unless God builds the house, we labour in vain. Unless God guards our city, our homes, we stay awake in vain! Since this is the case, it becomes important that the decisions we make are all God centred.

We may still build a blissful family without God. But it’ll only last this lifetime. With God, we can have a blessed family to last for eternity.

May the Lord help us.