Summary:
Sometimes we unwittingly jail ourselves in the prison of the unforgiving. To motivate ourselves to forgive others, let us recall how Jesus has forgiven us of our astronomical debt. What is the debt others owe us compared to what we owed Him? Release others, and in so doing, release ourselves. Bear in mind the negative consequences of not forgiving, because God also won’t forgive you. When we find it hard to forgive others, we need the Holy Spirit to transform us. Perhaps when we do so, it could be then that we receive the Holy Spirit, as it might have been the obstacle.

What comes to mind when you hear the word ‘prison’? A place of punishment. A place of confinement without any freedom. A place for bad guys. In recent months, COVID-19 stay home and quarantines. Whatever it is, prison is a place no one would want to end up in.

When the speaker was a young officer serving National Service, he was called upon to be the defendant officer for those charged in military court. To prepare the defence, he had to understand the circumstances surrounding the case. He would have to go to the detention barracks to interview them before they were taken to the military court. Some were away without official leave (AWOL), were involved in fights, or abused drugs. Those in the detention barracks were subject to regimental conditions such as having to sleep on the cement floor. They would want to get out and seek freedom. These are the first group of people who are thrown in - the ‘bad guys’. The second group of people willingly go in. They are part of a religious group that cannot bear arms. They give up their freedom for the sake of holding on to their beliefs. The detention barracks are ironic. It’s the same prison yet it contained some who wanted to gain freedom, and some who gave up their freedom willingly.

We have prisons in our lives today too. What are the prisons we have to be mindful about, prisons we have unwittingly checked ourselves into and given up our freedom?

1. Prison of the Unforgiving

Matt 18:23-35
Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made. The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, ‘Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt. “But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, ‘Pay me what you owe!’ So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’ And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt. So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done. Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’ And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him. “So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”

A servant owed the master 10,000 talents = 200,000 years of wages. This was an astronomical debt. The master was moved with compassion and forgave him of this debt, knowing he couldn’t pay for it. How should the servant have reacted? Of course he would have felt grateful. Besides that, he should have learnt the importance of forgiveness.

Instead, he took his fellow servant by the throat who owed him 100 denarii = 4/5 months of wages.

The word ‘forgiveness’ in the original language means to ‘release/let go’. The servant was released of his debt but wasn’t willing to release his fellow servant of his debt, locking himself into the prison of the unforgiving.

Our fists are tight and hearts closed up when we refuse to forgive. But when we forgive someone, our fists loosen and our hearts open. We release ourselves. Some of us have been in this prison for a long time. We are unable to forgive someone and have been bearing the grudge for a long time. We check ourselves into the prison of the unforgiving. We need to get out.

How?

Col 3:13
bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do.

What has Christ forgiven us of? It’s like the astronomical debt the servant was forgiven of by the king. Christ has forgiven the astronomical debt of our sin that we can never repay. Since He has forgiven us of this, what more us to forgive others who have wronged us? We owed God 10,000 talents and were forgiven. People only owe us 100 denarii.

It’s time for us to let go. Set the person free, and in turn, set ourselves free.

1 Cor 13:4-7
Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Have fervent love for each other. Bearing a grudge is not being kind, not bearing all things. Because we don’t forgive, sometimes we behave rudely. We need to live out love in order to forgive others.

The master had compassion and forgave the servant. Compassion and love are two sides of the same coin. Jesus was moved with compassion to feed the multitude instead of just sending them away. Jesus had so much compassion, He prayed for those who mocked Him as He hung on the cross. Jesus has set the example for us.

Nevertheless, it is difficult for us to forgive. For example, a drunk driver kills someone we love. Would we be able to forgive him? Someone does something very very wrong towards us, we wonder how we can ever forgive! Often we act just like the unforgiving servant. He could’ve forgiven but chosen not to.

We may choose to try to attempt to forget, or sometimes we don’t even attempt. Ultimately, it boils down to a few things. One is our pride. The servant must have been thinking: The 100 denarii is rightfully mine! How can I forgive him of it?

Col 3 tells us to look out for the interests of others. Did Jesus do that? Let’s not just think about our interests but also the interests of the person who has done wrong. Can we lower ourselves to accept his apology?

Sometimes we don’t want to forgive because it makes us feel like we are the weaker party and that we are the ones who have made the mistakes.

There’s a consequence when we don’t forgive.

Matt 18:35
“So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”

If we don’t forgive others their trespasses, our Heavenly Father won’t forgive us either. This is the consequence of remaining in the prison of the unforgiving for too long - God won’t forgive you. Not being forgiven by God is very serious. If you bear a grudge till the day we die, do you think God would have forgiven you of your sins on judgement day? Furthermore, not forgiving may cause us to sin more, as we store hatred in our hearts.

We sometimes unwittingly check ourselves into the prison of the unforgiving. But Matthew visits you in prison, bringing this story to help you get out of jail. Think about how God has forgiven you of all your astronomical sins. He’s even sent His Holy Spirit to live in us, accepted us as His son and promised us an inheritance that’s out of this world.

Let us think about: “How can I love and forgive others with the love God has forgiven me?”

Release others, and in so doing, release ourselves from the prison of the unforgiving. Bear in mind the negative consequences of not forgiving, because God also won’t forgive you.

Take a deep breath and pray that God will give us this strength to get out of this prison. So that we can forgive other people, not just once, but 70x7 times.

The Holy Spirit is our strength. When we find it hard to forgive other people, we need the Holy Spirit to transform us; to put down our pride and see the needs of those we have yet to forgive. The work of forgiving others shouldn’t remain as head knowledge, but put into action. It’s part of our training to be more Christ-like, for Jesus is the epitome of forgiveness. Perhaps when we start to give up our pride and forgive others, it could be then that we receive the Holy Spirit, as it might have been the obstacle.